Dealing with fixations

When i was in kindergarten, I had a friend who drew horses. she was very good at it. That was the only thing she ever drew. When i was in art school, there was a student who drew only rats. she was very good at it. so interesting………….

art is therapy is art is therapy is art is therapy is art is therapy is art is therapy is art is therapy is art is therapy is art is art is therapy…ad infinitum… I am looking for a car that has room for that bumper sticker.

I’m fixated on color, rich, bright, and omnipresent. My parents were very strict fundamentalists, and I had the most monochromatic, homogenous, and insular upbringing imaginable. When I hit eighteen I left the church and took up living (and art). On the rare ocassions when I can bring myself to visit my folks, I’m tut-tutted and tsk-tsked almost to madness. That I make a living (of sorts) from artistic endeavors is, to them, emblematic of my failure as a daughter. Yet I really believe that much of what I do, I do in wanton reaction, which I whole heartedly embrace, and much of which I have come to love. The artistic uses of color are certainly a primary (no pun) example.

Laura needs to re-commit to a program of growth and creative development. Her fixation is keeping her back and probably keeping her work amateur. It is a common phenomenon, maybe the most common phenomenon, in degree, that holds artists from becoming their greater selves. Our fixations can be wonderful and give us comfort. But they can also defeat us.

Trauma of any sort can have lasting effects. In some cases they are in the forefront of the mind always and never go away. At other times they are buried deep within where they rattle around doing damage to the soul. Anything that helps the person to understand the nature and full power of the trauma is valuable. Good, trusted and confiding friends are one of them.

Stewart Cubley’s customers are in therapy.

Hey Robert, ok, it is one thing to be expressive. The best thing about this artist is the work comes along, it gets done. There are a lot of artists out there who cannot get past the anxiety of getting work started, let alone finishing it. But the key to true creativity is to work beyond what you already know. Having that anxiety and ‘pause to wonder’ if a piece works and what is being communicated is true, is the passion all artists should be striving for. John Ferrie

Laura paints strong, dominant women because she needs to. Instead of getting her to paint something else entirely, why not use the fixation to teach her different painting techniques, incorporate different settings, add more elements to the painting, etc.? Youngsters with autism (and others, for that matter) often fixate on a single subject or interest. The fixation can be used as a conduit to teach skills in an effective way. Laura will probably not want to stop painting those strong women. Why should she? Our childhoods shape us, and sometimes it’s better to accept the way you are and think about how you can best use your own characteristics instead of always thinking you should be different.

Another therapy that may be helpful is Eye Movement Desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) It is used for PTSD, OCD, phobias and also as a very powerful visualization tool by athletes and artists. I had two sessions of it with a therapist to overcome some out of proportion fear acquired during an episode involving my horse and some firecrackers. Not only was it successful, but an interesting side effect was a dramatic lessening of my fear of heights as well! I have suggested it to friends with very serious issues, abuse, panic attacks, etc., and they have found much, sometimes total, relief. I now use a self applied version of EMDR to help me with my artwork.

Fixation is one thing and inspiration is quite another. But using one’s art to work through trauma is a whole different issue. Why do you think there is such a discipline as art therapy? It is especially helpful to children of abuse. I would urge “Laura” to pursue that aspect of her art. She may be unconsciously trying to leave these images because she is in some measure in recovery. Laura, please don’t let the means (your art) of resolving your childhood trauma escape you. For the rest of us fixation may simply be painting what we enjoy, or what sells. I have one artist friend who is so weary of painting Texas Bluebonnet paintings she could scream. But that is what her gallery wants. Fixation? No, pure economics. Sometimes we paint something just because we like it … no deeper reason than that.

This is a tough subject that needs to be more out in the open, and you have risen to the challenge. It is contributions as yours that offer hope to those who have suffered, and have been misunderstood, and too often maligned. Compassion and understanding go far in the healing process. Well done!

What we lean toward, leads to fulfillment within~ The eye, shiny ,full of hope travels to the hand ,creating freedom, passion & purity of heart!

Can you pass on to Laura that Emotional Freedom technique would probably be invaluable to her. This is a simple method of tapping on acupressure points in a particular order while talking about whatever one is fixated on or afraid of (there are other ways of using this methodology and this is just one of them). It separates the emotional attachments to a memory from the memory itself. I have used this very successfully with clients I have had who were mentally, physically or sexually abused as children. I do not know where Laura lives of course but there are EFT therapists all over the world now. In Toronto a friend of mine, Crystal Hawk, teaches EFT and is also a therapist. She does some work over the phone for her clients.

I was an Art instructor for over 25 years, a few years with young people, then adults. Many times, I watch people “find their voice” become more confident in themselves. Giving them the permission, and the knowledge to express their feelings, on paper and canvas, was one of the most rewarding experiences for me. Better still is to see many of them, or receive letters, note or e-mails hearing of their successes, not only in painting but in life. To express our self, is natural, we only have to look at young pre-school children. Creating Art in what ever form,we chose, is Gods gift to us…..we see that every day all over the world. Colour, shapes, line formed in or on clay, glass, fabric, paper, canvas, wood even in the sand. If it helps to ease the past or create the future, explore it, embrace it .

I spent ten years teaching art therpy to convicts at Matsqui Institution. We found SHRINKING the issues the best to help people feel CLEAN about themselves! Personally I had my faith in Christ help me as HE washed my feet through meditation. Great souls like Bhudda and Christ know meditation as a form of healing! I know many people are not of my faith, but when a soul asks help, there is no karma attached to it, so I can then help. Otherwise if they don´t request help, karma is attached and the soul who rushes out to help suffers the bad idea! In this case we can bless Laura´s condition and our meditation or prayer is the GOOD WILL which helps her!

Sad that we have to (or want to) think in terms of “overcoming” our addictions/experiences. They give us much: when in the throes of addiction those afflicted struggle to assert themselves as unique. Yet the very process of struggling affects our art in a truly unique way. Both, those affected and those living and dealing with those affected, tend to exhibit remarkably similar effects. And for both the true path out is to make the emotional investment required. CBM sounds to me like another easier, softer university “discovery”. Why do the 10,000 hours to get good at something work? Because in those hours are plenty of opportunities to experience pain, to make us ready to try something else. Why do we think there should be an easier way when dealing with our very makeup, the experiences that had part in shaping us. I would say; Let’s encourage each other to make the real effort required to make the changes we want in our lifes. That work will be emotional, sometimes gutwrenching, and the results will have been earned. A maybe interesting observation. I started painting with total abstracts, not sure what I needed to express. Then I developed landscapes, then wildlife. After a long while I started to include people. I spent 40 years of my life telling anyone who was interested, that I liked machines better than people. When I opened up about my art with people, interestigly the people in my art became more detailed. A couple years later I noticed myself sketching faces. Lo and behold, today I like talking to people! It took some painwork and some forgiveness, but my life is infinitely better for it! And hey, I learned to pay attention to important little things, like your messages.

You’ve said it before. Most of what ails us and holds us back can be fixed by ourselves.

Robert and others — There are so many programs that purport to “fix us” and each and every one of them claim to be the only road to salvation. I’ve encountered so many of these, mostly expensive, lengthy processes that, when they don’t live up to their hype, end up blaming the seeker for not trying hard enough or being committed enough. Then there is one more “failure” to add to the pile. We all have problems, and some of them are bad enough to dominate our lives. The road you take depends on where you are starting from and where you want to end up. Some of those programs work for some people. I don’t know of anything that will work for everybody, and that includes religion, psychological therapy, and medications. Like it or not, we each have to walk our own road; no one else can do it.

I read with great interest and enthusiasm your informed and insightful missives about art and Art. I really don’t know how to respond when you write about Psychiatry. I want to believe, but how can any of us know the truth(s) about art (which, arguably you do) and all of our neuroses and psychoses (which, arguably you don’t). Am I assuming too much…or too little?

If only your mother had been well, she would have known what to do, but she wasn’t and neither were they, so its up to you. Keep painting those women, and listen to quieter self, the one that remained silent and strong, the one that survived long enough into adulthood — I believe the two are one. The love you have naturally is helping you break free of the cycle — I imagine like this — you’re sometimes scared of life- of living, and its difficult to make strides and feel normal — what is normal anyways?? You may feel like someone is watching you, and its not a nice feeling, you don’t want people to notice you — it makes you feel like they’re in control, that they are better off than you. You may at times be triggered and its difficult to explain, you feel thoughts deeply at times. Friends/family misunderstand and you don’t blame them because who could really understand any of this. You don’t want to die this way and you don’t want to give into this so you keep reaching and knocking and its working — good job!! STAND YOUR GROUND Laura’s of the world, be aware — use your extra heightened senses to motivate your abilities. I am so sorry that we have to go through this type of management. If only…if only they saw how gentle you were and loving, they would have known to protect you rather than harm you. I want to let you in on a secret — you’re not alone and yes, you are loved ~ there is no reason to be ashamed — you must tell yourself even if you don’t believe it, you owe yourself that much for what you’ve endured.

The process of healing certainly involves emotions, negative and positive. Part of recovering those emotions and reconnecting them through proper channels — is to recognize emotions are energy, they replay life — shine a light so to speak. They tell us some truth about how we felt and how we are feeling and what we might feel. Along with recovering our emotions we gain access to visual. Good, bad and the ugly. The negative to something has the ability to leads us to a positive . With every bad memory we gain access to a good one. We have had to learn to be connected within situation to gain a visual per se, on the subject at hand — usually involving ourselves as a viewer looking into and at a piece of art work and as a piece of art work being looked at by a viewer. It‘s recognizing and stopping and taking note: Note to self — It’s ok to look, it’s ok to remember and it‘s ok to talk about things — life has no limits. One has to be committed to a better way, wanting the self to be immerse in a baptism of unconditional love — “A person who can open their heart to an enemy can save the world.” -unknown

“Obsession is just a put-down word used by people who can’t concentrate on anything for longer than 10 minutes.” -unknown

Looks like nothing changes. Russian figurative art where the people are either melancholy or devoid of emotion.

You are way too cool Robert. Walmart, ha ha, so abstraction and art are beginning to add up? At least in Scottsdale Arizona? Too funny! Point being stay yourself, be steady in your work, take hold the helm, wait, you are before your time at times. love schar

Thank you for all the caring and concerned comments regarding “Laura”. Rest assured I will not stop painting my Strong Women. I have no choice “they come through me”. This last year has been very healing for me as I have found the wounds that my mind has hidden for many years. Being raised by trained professionals has given me the tools to heal the found wounds, true healing is inevitable. I have a couch and a very special friend who have known me forever helping me through this. I am actually feeling very strong and empowered by the healing process. It saddens me that abuse and torture of children is so rampant. I want to publicly say thank you to Bob Genn for touching on a very difficult subject. For all of those who have dealt with abuse and torture remember it is not your fault. Seek help and do not be ashamed. Your inner child will guide you through, but first don’t be afraid to reach out. My strong women will be stronger and always dominate my choice of subjects after all, are they my alter ego? However it is with great delight that I am exploring other subjects. I am having fun, feel I am thriving, look forward to tackling whatever a new day has to offer. And I thank my family of fellow Painters Keys followers for their advice and concerns.

You can see CBM in many artists particularly Egon Sheile, Francis Bacon and Vincent Van Gogh and Gustave Klimt to name just a few. There are many more. They are definitely working out some repressed or observed psychosis in their art. It has been said, and history bears truth to it, some of the most provocative works comes from artists like these. This type of (artist) person is compelled to express their need to understand themselves. Unfortunately many live horrible lives and never succeed in coming to grips with their psyche if the psychosis is too deeply imbedded. I happen to fall into the relatively well adjusted side so I lean toward painting the one mystery that never ceases to intrigue me- the human form and women in particular. I’ve understood for some time now that my painting women is due to some deep seeded need to find my relationship to the opposite sex.

After reading Robert’s letters and most of the responses, I understand my problem – well, one of them at least. So, no more rocks and roots, no more barns, no more interiors, and no more conventional portraits and figure studes. From now on it’s tough-looking, thick-necked women in tight skirts and high-heeled jackboots. Thank you Robert, I feel better already!

To Dan Spahn — Russian art is devoid of emotion or melancholy? I don’t find it so at all. If anything it tends to be romanticized. The brilliant colors and strong value range make this a whole other branch of expressionism, and it’s inspiring.

I don’t see the difference between an addiction and an obsession, except that the former might be more hurtful than the latter. But in my opinion anything that keeps you “stuck” is bad. People, and artists particularly, need to constantly move on. It should be our “compulsion” to move on. That’s a better word.

I am celebrating Laura. She is the strong woman she has been painting all this time. Thank you, Laura, for posting your own sense of what this is all about. While almost everyone else has been trying to interpret your question in terms of their own uncertainties or fears (a pretty normal human response, actually), you stayed clear on what your specific need at this moment in time is. I am happy for you. I also am grateful to you. I understand something now about myself that was not quite so clear until you posted, and gave me a way to define it clearly to myself. This is not about “fixing”. It is, perhaps, about healing. Most of all, it is about being. Though I’ve been here before, I’ll leave this post anonymous, for personal reasons.

I so identified with Laura. You could have been writing about me, Robert, and for that I thank you. There is no other like this site on the internet.