How to prevent choking

This is what literacy investigators call “affect” or the phenomenon of “Mind Shame” which is what comes from being improperly encouraged for the good you have done and criticized solely on the mistakes you’ve made. Some of us had parents who knew no other method of parenting because of their own upbringing and fear of the shame of failure. It might come from the generation now deceased that had large families in which shame was the motivating factor that stern mothers and fathers used to influence the brothers and sisters to compete. On top of that, artists often are associated with a type of failure known as the “ne’er do well” for having chosen a creative career with its attendant uncertainties and lack of prestige. Good post.

A guilty conscience, yeseree!!! Look at Tiger Woods, my bet is that he’ll be in a serious bout of choke for some time.

Whenever I choke I can hear my mother saying, “You loser!”

I choke because I am afraid of what winning will do to me.

Choke by Dawdling interests me. It seems when I have more time, I take more time, and I sometimes overwork. “Work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion.” usually referred to as Parkinson’s Law, is part of this formula. When there is lots of time, efficiency is neglected, and it is often efficiency that keeps things fresh.

What a wonderfully clever letter!!! But then they all are; it’s just that this one really tickled. Thank you.

I choke at workshops and whenever I’m being watched as I paint. That’s why I’ve just about given up but I haven’t known why. It helps to know that I may be able to work my way through this wall

A few weeks ago, I attended a meeting with some friends. After the meeting and during the main course of the meal, I suddenly choked seriously on the food. After a hard time for a few seconds, I suddenly realized that all was not well at all. I could neither rid the obstruction nor breathe. I was indeed choking to death; the world was rapidly receding and unconsciousness was very near. After what seemed an age, one of the group, who turned out to be a returning soldier from action overseas, leapt up to be my saviour. I thank the stars that he was so well trained. for he implemented the Heinlich manoeuvre! I discovered afterwards that this soldier had actually saved my life. It was when I read your ‘choking’ letter Robert, that I realized the parallel – for after that accident I have discovered that each day really is so vital in one’s life. Instead of ‘live now pay later’ it is more a question for me of ‘live now enjoy the later bit!’ Certainly the writing block I had been not enjoying was then lifted……… Trunch, Norfolk, England

This is interesting…this is why I work on 2 pieces at the same time….as I think about one, I can work on the other until I get to a point where the dialogue takes over…

I’m surprised that my Muse loves Maria Calas!!!!!!!!! It seems I can get into a meditative state when I don’t know the words………Indeed I do my best work when I set everything up then take a few moments to relax and play …… sometimes just putting on a beautiful undercoat and premixing beautiful piles of paint gets the juices flowing………

Fantastic Robert! I like ’em all, but this piece is particularly and curiously apt. Made me think, but also ‘unthink’. Thank you for all the wonderful ‘waker-upper’ letters — and Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.

So many hazards in our way. The brain is a wonderful thing but, as you say, can botch the process. Good advice to free yourself from stress and hear music in your head or from the boom box.

I have always called this Painter’s Block… sort of like writer’s block. Any time it has happened to me, I simply change what I am doing, even if I’m on deadline, and either paint something I WANT to paint or go read a book. Either way I will take a few days away from what is blocking my work and when I return it is like the what was locking up the ability was never there.

I am on an Island and have been reading your letter on “choking”. Is this the same as performance anxiety gone a step further? I am an artist…..and an admirer of dog agility teams. My husband is 1/2 of 3 teams. I don’t know if you are familiar with agility or not, but in a nutshell, the team (dog and handler) navigates a course of obstacles and are scored and placed based on time and correctness of execution. One of the things that I have observed is just what you have mentioned in this letter on choking.

Now you have me laughing! I paint outdoors in the sun on the hottest days of summer and often find myself singing “Mad Dogs and Englishmen…”

I have found that listening to audio books while working gives my left brain something to ” work” on while my right brain is painting. It sort of keeps both sides of the head busy and out of each others’ way. Choking or stalling happens less frequently when the whole brain is working.

“If you think you can, or you can’t, you’re always right!” I don’t remember who said it, but it fits right in with this week’s message.

However you put it, or however it sneakily masquerades, there is only one thing that I have identified as my choker — FEAR. To start brave and end brave is a sunny day at a happy easel for me. One thing that sometimes snaps me out of fear is anger — it gets me back into a power position back from the cowardly mood and makes me own my skill. It doesn’t always work. I’ll try singing but I doubt that will have enough kick to drag me from under the bed.

Integrity and honesty is what rest behind all the aspects of the creative process, be it music, poetry, painting, etc. When one feels funny or any other sensation that suggest to him, her, that he, she are not their usual selves, they should turn to their mental safe deposit box, open it and go through all their “saving accounts” to check the level of intimacy with one self that is so crucial for the stability of the creative individual, what I am trying to say is: one must accumulate reserves in the shape of enlistment for a rainy day to bail him out in times of confusion and uncertainty. I call it the PCs of the self in the face of the other.

Taking more time is just as dangerous as hurrying through, in fact, more so. Choking mostly happens when I am not on a roll.

Working with a small amount of stress is the principle behind Toastmasters. By speaking to a group of mostly sympathetic listeners who want t see the speaker succeed and get better, paves the way for public speaking before large audiences.

Yes, the self-taught artist, or at least the artist who at some time goes into the self teaching mode, is the one who succeeds. The vast majority of art school graduates do not take this important next step.

I’ve always preferred to hum my way around my studio on my own.

It may be that as you get older your prefrontal cortex is getting depleted further and further, this the tendency of older artists to choke.

YES. And to combat this stuff, I have found that working in the public view, while nerve wracking at first, really can make you more immune to that kind of stress. IF you just don’t acknowledge the public while you’re working and they make comments, other than to say thank-you (for kind ones). You might think you’re being facetious going out in public to paint when you’re not ready, but it is the only way to really get ready for that. Just like entering work in an exhibit helps you learn how to enter work into an exhibit. Takes a bit of boldness but it’s not going to kill you. And when in public, you start realizing that most all the people who come by don’t know anything about what you’re doing. So do as you will!

As always, your letters are very insightful and this one hit its mark with me. I have always called “choking” “blocking” but I guess they are one and the same. I used to tear up my IQ tests in high school because I would block, freeze, choke or whatever. When they told me I was university material I asked how they knew. They had my public school records. I had to chuckle though, when mentioning different situations where one can choke, you failed to mention sex! I wonder if singing helps?

I don’t know about singing, but music definitely helps.

I have always sung or hummed, according to whether I was alone or other people were around. Then I read some place that you can’t think bad thoughts when you are singing or humming, so I had an excuse. It really does work.

I just returned from an intensive workshop. The first two compositions simply flowed and I count them among my best. But the final one was another matter altogether. I felt creatively constipated – choked. Next time that happens I’d try humming my anxieties away.

Anyone with a recent Charles Reid video will recognize the phenomenon; he whistles and blows as his brush lights up the paper. Little did I realize what was going on! Thank you Robert.

I find this quite interesting. I have taken to choking lately. For a while my paintings just seemed to flow but lately I have felt stiff to say the least. I will try this different approach.

Choking is no more than a moment of doubt or indecision. Happens to everyone. Don’t fret over it, quickly move on to another area and do what’s needed and forget about it. Take a break. A real break. forget about the work and do something completely different. Years ago when I had a seemingly unsolvable problem, the first opportunity I had, I took a nap for about fifteen or twenty minutes. When I awoke, and resumed working, and answer seemed to present itself. If you “dog” it your in for hours of turmoil. Let it go and relax and choking will happen less and less.

Did you know that stammerers improve by singing their words? Another kind of choking.

Not given to frivolous emailing – thought I had to provide you with a real odd ball response to this one! After having a batik and hand painted silk scarf business in my twenties & early thirties, I developed environmental sensitivities in my forties. After singing at the top of my lungs while painting for years – I had to stop. I still mourn that loss – and never knew why until your letter. I also changed my palette from cadmiums & cobalts first – then as more problems ensued – to as many natural pigments as possible.The earth colours, ivory black, rose madder – etc. I add in Ultramarine and Prussian blues and a yellow – and a warm red – when its unavoidable.(I use some plant pigments from Germany when available) I wear a British Respro mask (replaceable filters – for pollution) while painting – either outside – or with lots of windows open(on smoke free days) All this & a somewhat energy consuming ADHD 21 yr old son – and reduced marketing opportunities since my Vancouver Island relocation 22 years ago – have – yes -reduced me to a rather choked painter. After one gets in this almost paralyzing groove – how does one put an end to the ‘stereotype threat’ -that inevitably takes hold? I absolutely love your letters by the way – makes me feel a connection in an otherwise solitary profession – where it sometimes feels like we are all reinventing the wheel on a daily basis in our own little spaces. (Not really as depressing as it sounds – bit of poetic license – Life always unfolds as a never ending series of paintings for me!) jenniferlawsonart.com

p.s. After more thought on this I realized one more reason for “choking”. I’ve found in the past that after working on a piece for awhile that refuses to come together, I begin to understand the idea itself was the problem. The original concept wasn’t thought out clearly and the results were the proof. It isn’t a crime to abandon an idea or rework the original idea. This ‘doubt’ many times is the cause of “choking”. We get caught up in the moment and don’t see the problem and feel it’s too late to stop now. Today, I wipe it off and rethink it. If I can’t resolve it now, I either leave it and come back another day. Art can’t be forced and needs to flow naturally.